Women in PNG

Hi again! Today is another beautiful day here in PNG. Its about 82 degrees in the house with a light cross breeze that keeps it very comfortable. I was thinking that I would like to blog some more about our trip but didn’t have much to say about our time here as not much has changed. So I thought I would give a perspective of what life is like to live as a women in PNG.

I think that in America for the most part women are valued. There are many women that want to be treated as equals, but in my opinion we aren’t equal to men and I don’t want to pretend that I am. Instead we have different attributes that make us just as valuable, but not equal. In the Ericosn house there are blue jobs, pink jobs, and purple jobs. A blue job is a job that is performed by Steve and primarily Steve (never say only). Pink jobs are Becky jobs, and purple jobs are for either. For example changing the oil in the car is a blue job. Yes I could learn how to do it, and sure if I wanted to be just like one of the guys I would. Hmmm, but I don’t want to or have the need to be the same as Steve. The Lord made me good at different things and I am pleased to leave that messy and time-consuming job up to my husband. Now make sure all you ladies take this with a grain of salt. If you have a desire to change the oil in the car go for it I’m sure your spouse would love that, but then that would be a gift that the Lord gave you, that I didn’t get. ☺

I say all this to point out the fact that women have many different qualities that allow them a way in which to serve their family. This is where men and women become a valuable part of the family by using their different talents. PNG women live very contrasting lives.

Just as I was getting ready to put Gracie down for her nap, it was the second time in 2 days that a husband came to “sell” his wife. When we moved into the new house it was assumed that we would need help inside and out. Therefore husbands are out scouting work for the wife or wives rather then looking to pour out their own blood and sweat for the income. It is assumed that all the inside chores as well as weeding/gardening is for the women to do. At the same time the women are expected to continue with all of the home chores such as cooking and taking care of the children. Women are expected to chop fire wood and kindling. It is the wife’s job to till the garden, plant the seeds, harvest the food. (Men are to dig the irrigation) It seems women deal with polygamy. When approached about having some work done around the house (like yard work) one man said he had many women to work. Our house mary’s husband left her 3 years ago for another women. Now I’m not saying that this doesn’t happen in America as it has become much more prevalent, but here it is a way of life, and back home it as least as seen as a shameful act.

It is also true that here white women are not treated with the same value. I use the word value here instead of equality because we are not made the same but should be respected. In one of our first days in PNG a women whom I have come to greatly respect, Martha Hinton, told me that if you want a man that is working for you to do a specific task you must tell them that your husband said so. I was so taken back by this. I am paying this person and he won’t do what I ask? Only if my husband wants it done? No way, this can’t be. Not until we had a man come work in our yard did I find this to be true. I had fed this particular gentleman maybe 5 times in the last two weeks and yet he still had not learned my name. When he came to work at 8 am I was told that he expected breakfast, a snack at 10 and lunch. I was also told what he would do around the yard to clean up. Wait aren’t I the employer? Don’t I make the terms? Aren’t I handing over the dough? This was a very humbling experience for me as I had to swallow my pride and realize that I wasn’t in America, and the culture here is very different. This was not a “dig” at me, but what all women deal with while living in PNG. To take a submissive role, work hard, and follow instructions.

I hope that this brief description of what it is like to be a women in PNG reminds us American women that we are not equal to men, just as one women is not equal to another, but that we are valued and well taken care of. That many of us are nurtured and encouraged rather that expected and that we have a wonderful opportunity to be a witness to our family by serving them with grateful hearts.